Wishing You A Merry Christmas!

 Hi Everyone,

 Well Christmas is coming way to fast for me in one respect and damn it not fast enough in another. I am getting a little tired now all of these Christmas pages, but this one I did for fun. It is a kit that my Sister In Law sent me a link to called Pink Paradox Productions. It is  a free kit and she sent me the link so I went and had a look at it and thought... hmmm I think that I will sit down and do something with this and so here you have it. Click to enlarge as always! Oh the Angel is from Purple Folie. They have some great tubes over there too.

 I am a bit aggravated tonight. I talked with Barbara and she said that she is going to fly out Sunday after next with Matthew and I guess that they will be gone about 6 weeks this time around. I am upset with Matthew because he should be saving money to try and get a place of his own for his son. He seems to do just the opposite of anything that I suggest so I told Barbara tonight to tell him that I am done offering advice that he is not going to take. It is a waste of my breath to keep advising him on what he should do in regards of having a stable home for Alex... For Pete's sake we have been around this issue now for 5 years. It is time that he does something about it.
 I do not volunteer this information. He calls and says "Mom what should I do?" and I am not the only one that is fed up with giving advice. Jon and Karyn and Laurie have all said... "We give him good advice and he will not take it so why does he keep asking?" So with this latest episode we are all just done. We love him and have always bailed him out when things got rough, but obviously he is going to be just fine making his own mistakes.
 Do I sound Pissy? Well I am.
 The whole reason that Alex's mom will not let him come for summers and such is because Matthew does not have a stable place to live. We are deprived of being in Alex's life because of this. We cannot be with him. I certainly cannot afford to fly out to Nevada and such. Jonathan and Karyn never have even seen him, Laurie was there when he was born but hasn't seen him since he was a month old and trust me, there will come a time when Matthew will need to provide a home for him. And Matthew is well aware of the seriousness of this situation.
 But as always he just goes his own way and so be it... I can't help him anymore. We have all just kind of given up. He makes good money but instead of getting a place to live and a car, he rents a car every time he comes home and he blows all his money and goes back to work eating soup if that.

 Ok well it is time for me to change the subject because the more I think about it the more angry I become. Not at him but for the situation he puts himself in if that makes sense.

 Not sure what is going on with Karyn. She was supposed to have come and changed my bandage but she didn't so I took it off when I showered yesterday. I have called and text her and have not heard a word from her. So I don't need her to come over here and do it tomorrow either. The packing came out when I took off the bandage. It will be closed up by Monday and I really hope that it has healed enough. I could see fresh skin growing over the incision. I don't need for it to build up fluid inside but she is not going to be able to get into it to pack it since skin is now growing over the top of it.No reason for her to come and try and pack it so IF she calls I am going to tell her not to bother. I am so Pissy DONE! I know that it was a little time consuming coming over Tuesdays and Thursdays and on the weekends. I get that. But at least she could call me and say Hey Mom I can't come. Or answer her damn phone. What if I needed her for an emergency?
 And I am going to have to get someone else to handle my paperwork for me. I am getting hospital bills for the last 4 months that she has promised to take care of. My insurance is supposed to cover these bills. She is my authorized representative. She is on all of my paperwork to take care of things. She is the one to be notified of an emergency and yet she never has her phone on. She turns it off and I can never get a hold of her. So I have to get this taken care of. Even if it is an emergency the hospital cannot get in touch with her so what is the point of having her as my emergency contact?
 Jonathan is to far away to get to me in an emergency unless he is at home. He is an hour away during the day and some Saturdays.. She is 10 minutes away. That is why we decided that she should take care of this for me and because Jonathan works in a different office doing different paperwork and is not on top of this as she is at her job. I can't help but to feel that if this was Joe's mom she would be rushing right on over to help. Is that crappy of me? I suppose it is but at the same time I have been put on the back burner a lot. I should never have moved here. I feel that I am a problem to them. Good to cook a meal, clean the house, do the dishes and laundry but not fricking good enough to pick up the phone and say hi mom how are you? do you need anything? Or not even that. Just to say Hello.

 Cisco is throwing up again. Not food really. It is like he is having an asthma attack. I called the vet because I was scared that he was going to quit breathing. The vet said it is  Allergies... Give him a benadryl and it has seemed to work. Maybe it is just allergies. He seems ok today. Nothing has slowed him down. He has been on the go all day!

 My bedding is washed and in the dryer. I had to wash it all because we have gotten rain and Mr. Cisco decided to walk in the mud and then roll all over my bed.... Rotten dog! A sweet Rotten dog but still Rotten!

 Guess that my rant is over for awhile. I don't mean to be this way but sometimes I just can take so much and I have reached my limit today. I am tired and that always makes me cranky. I have to get to Wal-Mart tomorrow and pick up some of my meds. I have discovered that I am out of one of mine. How did that happen? I could have sworn that I had a 3 month supply. So tomorrow it is time for me to go and get that taken care of.

 Y'all have a Blessed Day or Evening. I am going to close for now and go and watch something on Netflix. Maybe a Christmas movie or maybe not. I will be glad when the holidays are over this time around. Other than a few people that I really want to spend the holidays with and a few friends that share my spirit is the only part of the holidays that I am looking forward too. Just really tired lately.

 Love to all... (I mean that).... BB